The Storm After The Calm?

I don't know why, but I've always been really laid back when it comes to exams. I leave revision until no earlier than the fortnight or sometimes the week before the exam, simply because I work better that way, if I attempt revision before then it will be of no use to me in the exam. One strange thing though, about my exam behavior is that I never get nervous beforehand. 

I've seen it time and time again, myself and my cohort or class waiting outside the examination hall, everyone with their heads in their notes and chatting anxiously about what the questions may be, panicking that they may have missed something in their revision. And then there's me. Literally, as calm as can be. It's not even as though I panic when I sit down in front of the paper, or while I'm writing, or when I leave. When I get home however, a completely different story ensues. This is the time that I worry, I turn the exam paper and the answers I wrote over again and again in my head. It's torture. Honestly, I realise that I am very lucky not to panic and become stressed before or during an exam, it really helps me to concentrate on answering the questions, but sometimes it really is a curse as well as a blessing. 

Sometimes I wonder if it's just me? I've never met anyone else who openly admits that they feel calm during an exam. I know the likelihood is that there is someone out there who experiences something similar, but I am yet to find them. I'm extremely thankful for being able to be this way. Hopefully it will help me through my time as a student. I must say however, like everyone else, I do not like exams. I think the idea of telling someone that they have X amount of time to answer questions and they must do so in exam conditions (which - although people may disagree - is not conducive to passing an exam, I don't know anyone who feels comfortable in an exam hall) throws people off. I know it has done for me in the past. I understand that the exam conditions are in place to prevent cheating etc, but the time limit is what really gets me. I know  that we couldn't have all the time in the world. But why not just say, answer the questions and when you're finished, hand your paper in and leave? Surely this would improve pass rates? Maybe it's just me, maybe people agree with me. It's just a thought. One that I know will never be the done thing. But a thought none the less. 

So here I am, post exam - the stress of worrying about last weeks exam is just about wearing off. Nobody likes waiting for things, and waiting for results can seem like a life time. I'm not entirely sure what the outcome may be, I'm not too confident. I faired better in one question than I did in the other, but we will see. 

Wish me luck! 

Lonesome This Christmas ...

While reading Volume 28 (December 18th) of nursing standard. I came accross the feature with the subtitle "What should health and wellbeing boards do to tackle loneliness among older people?" and I read some of the responses & have been thinking about this issue a lot since then. But while at work today I found myself in a conversation I never expected to be in, and it brought to light some issues similar to this that may fall by the wayside when it comes to developing initiatives to tackle loneliness. I was speaking to a man, whom I would say was just below the threshold to be regarded as middle-aged and he wished me Merry Christmas and I wished him the same. But what shocked me is that he then replied with "Well I'll try but it's not much fun on your own" and his eyes started to well with tears, not to the point of crying, but to the extent that I could see he was upset. I thought I would try and cheer him up so I asked what he was going to have for his dinner on Christmas Day. And he described his dinner to me, all in portions for one and all the while his eyes still shimmered from the light catching the tears in them. I went on to say that I'm sure he can find something enjoyable to busy himself with on Christmas day, by perhaps treating himself to a couple of presents - no need to wrap them unless he wishes to - to himself, from himself. He then smiled a wholly honest smile and told me he was going to do just that. I can't deny that I felt a huge pang in both my stomach and my heart when he smiled at me. I felt like I had done something good. Even if he smiled a million more times that day, I'm glad I got to be the reason for one of them.

On a more serious note however, in a time where we are conerned with th health and well being of the elderly in our society, and how they can fall victim to chronic loneliness especially at this time of year, should we not also spare some thought and consideration for those from all age groups and walks of life who also live lonely lives. Which are no doubt made to feel all the more loney at Christmas time. I am not saying we should each invite a stranger to join in withour Christmases but what I am saying is that should we not be making provisions to combat loneliness for everyone and not just the elderly?

It's just a thought really which struck me today when I spoke to this gentleman. I would love to hear  what everyone else thinks on this issue.

X

What Would You Do?

Today I found myself in a dilemma. This week I saw a post on my Facebook news feed which - although I won't go into much detail to uphold confidentiality and privacy - could have caused offence to some, and which was extremely controversial. The thing that made this particular post worse, was that it had been uploaded by a student nurse. We are all more than familiar with the risks and rules we need to adhere to and consider when using social media in a profession such as Nursing. However, it was clear that this particular individual was either unaware of the rules regarding social media posts, or they knew of the rules, but did not care or did not fully understand the possible repercussions of such a post. After discussing it with myself and other people through my anonymous twitter page @StudentMHNurse I decided to get in touch with the person and to let them know that this could cause problems for them with regards to their studies and registration with the NMC in the future. Although I was trying to help, I can understand that sometimes messages and meanings of these messages can sometimes be misconstrued on social media platforms. My advice did not go down well at all with the recipient. Perhaps I would have reacted in a similar way had I thought that someone was patronising me - but this was of course not my aim - I was genuinely concerned that they could have put their university place and registration potential at risk by posting such material on their page. I will say one thing, that the material did not in any way offend me personally, but still that is beside the point. It was easy to see that if certain cultures and groups of people had seen it, then they would have been offended by it - which is wholly unacceptable. 

I have learned from this that sometimes although you have someones best interests at heart, they can struggle to see this. But I have also learned by talking about it to other people that I wasn't wrong in what I did, and I would do it again if I had any concerns for someone else on social media whether that be anonymously or through my personal pages. This brings to light the misunderstandings that can sometimes be at play with regards to the guidelines and rules of using social media when in a profession such as Nursing. It also highlights misunderstandings that can occur between human beings, which can be very frustrating for both parties. 

I'm curious to find out what other people would have done in my situation? Would you have kept quiet? Would you have said something too? I'd love to know.

P.S

I apologise for the gap between this post and my last one. I've had a couple of personal things to sort out which of course took priority over everything else. But I am back now & will be more than making up for it in the coming days/weeks. 

Thanks .. X

Life Before Nursing ...

Now, I know that some people say that they've always known what they wanted to do and went straight for it without straying away from their path, but what about the people - like me - who originally either weren't too sure about where they wanted to go and what they wanted to do with their life? I can only speak for myself here of course, but becoming a nurse has only been a recent ambition of mine. Before that I wanted to be a forensic scientist, and then a teacher. I had my heart set on being a teacher ... and then I went to college and studied psychology and that was the day it changed forever. I didn't at that time of course know immediately that I wanted to become a Mental Health Nurse, but that was the first step on the pathway towards where I am today, waiting to start my training. It was actually one of my tutors in college who suggested to me that instead of doing Law (which was another phase I went through, thankfully one which didn't last long) that I take a look into Mental Health Nursing - If I'm honest I didn't really know it was such a thing. I went home and did a little bit of research, and I made my decision, that was what I wanted to do with my life. I was going to become a Mental Health Nurse. 

 

I've been watching a new program that some of you might be familiar with 'Educating Yorkshire' and it's stirred up a few things that I forgot ever existed, my old ambition of  becoming a teacher. I know enough to know that I don't at this time in my life, want to change my mind and change what I'm studying at University, but it just goes to show that some things never really leave you; old dreams, memories and ambitions. I 100% in my heart want to become a Mental Health Nurse, but maybe one day, if I ever need a change in career then that's something I could look into. But if I am really honest, the place in my heart that nursing has doesn't leave much room for anything else, and teaching is pretty much a memory and it's interesting to see how I've changed over the past couple of years. 

 

I would love to hear about anyone elses previous ambitions - if any, I would also love to hear about whether you knew you would always want to be part of the profession that you are now, whatever that may be. 

 

Thanks for reading! 

X

Money, money, money ...

I was laying in bed a couple of mornings ago and thought, wow it's really only 4 months until I start university ... I better get a move on and sort a couple of things out!!! One of the most important and most worrying things is money while I'm studying. Today I've set myself a goal of creating a rough draft of my budget for uni, I say rough draft because I don't yet know how I'll be traveling to and from uni (I'm staying at home while I study, very much a home bird!) I may or may not be driving by the time that my start date comes round so it's all up in the air with regards to that at the minute. However,what I do know is that it would be much, much more cost effective for me to be able to drive before I start the course, or soon after that time anyway. 

I've realised how lucky I am as an NHS student and as someone who has chosen to stay home while they study. As you all probably know, NHS students do not pay fees, which is a great help in that we know that there is at least one thing that we don't have to worry about paying back once we finish university and qualify. I was also talking to someone who is staying in university accommodation about money etc, and she told me that once she has paid for her rent and other necessities, she has only £30 to last her for each week. Now, I'm sure she can make do with that considering she also told me her parents are going to help her out but I can't help but compare it to my own situation where I could be left with around £100 to last me the week which of course for a student is absolutely brilliant. That is of course, without part time work. Speaking of which I do have a part time job at the minute but may have to give this up when I start Uni, but to be honest I'm really not sure yet, and it would be a great help to be able to stay on as it would obviously help out with any extra expenses and other things I might need to buy to help me through my course. And of course, would give me the freedom to afford things outside of university in my free time. 

Another thing I've been thinking about is student bank accounts, there are so many, but to be honest I just think I'm going to upgrade to a student account with the provider I'm already with as I haven't been with them long and it would probably be less of a hassle. Unless anyone knows anywhere that is offering a good student bank account deal?

I would really appreciate it if anyone has any ideas or tips about how to manage money while at uni or if they found anything that helped them manage their money well while they were studying. I will always appreciate someone taking the time to comment on my blog and to give me some hints and tips :)